Then I revised it.
And revised it again.
But...I'm not going to send it.
For once. For a change. This time I'm not sending it. This time I'm going to see what that feels like to just let her hate me. Or love me. Or whatever she feels. Or doesn't.
All I know is I was as close to who my authentic and true self is that I could be at the time. That I made some mistakes and I took responsibility for them - that I apologized and am making efforts to change for the better.
I cannot control what she does, what she thinks, what she feels.
I am worthy of love. I am worthy of being treated well, with respect and as a worthwhile human being.
But, I'm pretty sure we're never gonna talk about it, and we may never speak again. It's not my fault. It's not my choice. But I'll give her that.
